The Threat of False Intimacy

I recently listened to a secular podcast on love and sexuality, where the discussion revolved around the rise of AI companionship. This conversation highlighted how an increasing number of people are turning to AI for emotional support, counsel, and, for some, even sexual gratification. There are articles documenting individuals who claim to have fallen in love with an AI.

Given the integration of AI into many aspects of our lives, it's not surprising to hear about these occurrences. Researchers suggest that humans often project their emotions onto non-human interactions. Although we consciously understand that AI does not possess emotions, our interactions can lead us to invest emotionally, as this is how we are wired by God. We cannot disconnect this part of ourselves.

For instance, when using ChatGPT for tasks or inquiries, I find myself typing "thank you" and "please." I feel guilty if I issue commands without politeness! It seems I can't suppress my desire to express gratitude and courtesy.

The podcast speakers also mentioned that conversations with AI have helped improve their relationship skills with real-life partners. While I can see the potential benefits of using technology as a resource for practical advice in various life areas, including relationships, I believe a significant danger lies in turning to AI instead of seeking wisdom from God. He is the author of life and relationships, and neglecting to seek His guidance may lead us to tune out the Holy Spirit in our lives.

Reasons People Develop Dependency on AI and False Intimacy...

There are several reasons why people may become dependent on, attached to, or seek romantic relationships with AI. AI appears to be extremely validating, affirming, patient, and empathetic, always at the user's command. When individuals lack these qualities in real-life relationships, it can be tempting to turn to AI to meet those emotional needs. This reliance not only promotes selfishness but also circumvents the hard work of compromise, self-sacrifice, and other virtues that God intends for us to cultivate in order to love well and flourish as human beings.

This concept of false intimacy is also prevalent in the use of pornography, fantasy, and casual hookups in our culture. The epidemic of seeking false intimacy is damaging marriages, relationships, and ultimately, human souls. I am convinced that the allure of false intimacy through AI will continue to grow and poses a significant threat to covenant marriage.

Encouragement and Caution...

I am uncertain how this will all unfold in the future or how deeply ingrained AI will become in human interactions. However, I encourage you to discuss boundaries regarding technology with your spouse, evaluate its use, and establish limits on seeking advice from AI over God's Word and wisdom.

I trust that God is in control and that He will restore all that is lost. In the meantime, let us remain vigilant and commit to turning to our spouses and God, even when it is challenging or tempting to seek false intimacy to alleviate loneliness, anxiety, depression, or stress.

Struggling with intimacy in your marriage? I'm here to help. Reach me at: kristi@abidinglovecoach.com

Love,

Kristi