Extinguishing Fiery Arrows

I’m working on some online curriculum I’m really excited about for my premarital coaching program.

Consequently, today I was working on a section about protecting intimacy within the marriage covenant by building a fortress around it and anticipating all the fiery darts that come flying through the air aimed to kill, steal, and destroy what God calls good.

Sexual sin is running rampant. And I don't mean just in the world. I mean within the church. Among believers who, in their hearts understand that lust and misplaced emotional boundaries is wrong and distorts the intention of how God created intimacy to be enjoyed uniquely within marriage.

So, how does a couple overcome failing victim to the enemy's schemes to destroy their marriage intimacy?

Though there are many strategies for this battle, there are two main components that help a couple to walk faithfully in their wedding vows to one another and maintain secure intimacy with each other.

First, is the anticipation of the fiery darts that may come their way!

If an army knows that at enemy troop stood outside their fortress walls, they'd be able to take up arms, shoot arrows back, and prayerfully overcome that enemy's attack. But what happens in an unexpected ambush? The enemy sneaks in and overtakes their victims who have been caught completely off-guard.

Likewise, if you went to sleep and knew a thief was going to smash your window at midnight and steal your valuable diamonds and cash, you'd probably call the police ahead of time, stand guard over your home with a deadly weapon!

Well, the enemy of your soul and of your marriage stands right outside your home, and he's constantly planning an intrusion. The bible says, Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour." 1 Peter 5:8

So why wouldn't you be prepared for his schemes?

You can become prepared for his schemes by:

1. Building healthy boundaries around your marriage covenant. These boundaries are not meant to just be a list of rules to follow, but rather life-giving steps to cultivate safety, connection, security, and intimacy.

**Email me if you'd like a copy of this worksheet for you and your spouse!

2. Establishing accountability with trusted faith-filled and wise same sex friendships. These friends can help remind you of truth and pray for you and your spouse.

3. Cultivate mindfulness around your emotions, life-stressors, weaknesses, temptations, and ways the enemy has tried to work in the past so you can be prepared for these days and seasons.

Secondly, to overcome becoming a statistic of ruin in your marriage and life, it's important to abide in an intimate relationship with Christ.

Your spouse will not fulfill your every need for love, respect, and validation. We are a bottomless pit of need. And we need to turn to Jesus to fill this gaping hole in our hearts. When we cultivate intimacy with Him through being in His word consistently, talking to Him and listening to Him through prayer, and worshiping Him in song and serving others in love, we will be living with wisdom, with the armor of God to resist the devil, and with a peace that comes from living in alignment with who we are called to be in our adoption as sons and daughters of Christ.

If you'd like to talk more about this, again reach out. I'm here to help make a plan and encourage you in marriage.

Love,

Kristi